Greig’s story: “I learned to love myself again”
Experiencing loss can have a profound effect on our mental health and sense of self. Connecting with people who can understand what you’re going through can provide a lifeline even in the most difficult times.
Here Greig shares his story of coming through loss and difficulty, and finding a new direction with help from ANDYSMANCLUB.
My story
I began my mental health journey 4 years ago where, within a relatively short timeframe, I lost everything I love.
It broke me.
After clawing my way back to mental health and reaching out for help wherever possible, I found myself at ANDYSMANCLUB.
The warmth and support I received changed me for the better. I was asked to become a facilitator after a short time which gave me focus and a sense of worth I hadn’t allowed myself to feel.
The boost I got from helping others gave me a new direction. I learned to love myself again.
I worked hard and trained to achieve numerous certificates to follow this new purpose. As well as still volunteering as a facilitator at ANDYSMANCLUB, I now work as a Peer Support Worker for Health in Mind’s Community Mental Health and Wellbeing Team. I am fulfilled and driven, each of my traumas now serves to connect me better with my clients.
I’m as surprised as anyone to see such a literal case of turning negatives into positives.
It’s okay to talk
The following words were inspired by ANDYSMANCLUB and how it helped change my perspective on life and – through empathy and heartache – has gained me so many new brothers and friends.
I’ve got a mind that loves overtime, it rarely knows when to stop.
My thoughts endlessly multiply, then I start right back at the top.
I’ve been close to the edge, I’ll admit it, when keeping it together felt hard,
Smiling politely and saying “I’m fine” whilst quietly falling apart.
But thoughts aren’t always instructions, and noise doesn’t always mean truth.
Sometimes you need to silence the chatter and give your mind room to reboot.
I’ve learned to set myself targets, small victories which count as a win.
Some days it’s climbing a mountain, some days it’s just showing up to begin.
I’ve learned to look through the clouds, for colours that hide in the grey,
Because rainbows too need rain to appear— I tell myself that each day.
We’re terribly good at wearing our masks, at hiding the cracks underneath,
The “I’m fine” mask fits every day — though sometimes it’s hard to breathe.
We wear one for work, one for family, one for the friends that we meet,
Until hiding behind all the others means forgetting the face underneath.
I’ve learned that you don’t walk alone, there’s strength in the friends that you choose.
Find your tribe, the ones who get you, the ones who remind you of you.
And when everything feels overwhelming, don’t suffer in silence don’t hide.
Sometimes the strongest thing you can do is simply let others inside.
Take time to work on yourself and be patient with who you become.
Learn to love this version of you before your head’s overrun.
There’ll be days when the clouds gather, and days when the sun shines through.
You’re more than just your worst moment and there’s still plenty of life left in you.
If today you’re just holding on don’t think that you’ve somehow failed
because the fact you’re still holding on is exactly how resilience is made
So if your mind gets too noisy, or the road feels too hard to walk,
Find someone you trust, share the burden, and remember it’s okay to talk.
By Greig Bain
Find out more about ANDYSMANCLUB on Midspace.